Never make comparisons

I've just got back from a few days at home - a feel refreshed and ready to give my all to the hectic few weeks that lie ahead. It was hard being away from Nathan for so long; I didn't think it was possible to miss someone you had hardly spent any time with, but it was. However, I wasn't surprised at this - we've been here before with Chris, and look how that turned out...

Nathan and I have become close already, but thankfully he has the sense to still keep me on my toes and at arms length. I find myself consistently comparing him to Chris, and its really not fair on him. I guess its because I don't want to make the same mistakes twice - I may not have been in love with Chris, but it still hurt like hell.

I could make a list of how they differ - but I don't need to - having just read Chris's blog, I know Nathan is in a different league. Chris recently wrote about breaking up with one of the two other girls he had "relationships" with - and guess what - he ditched her on her actual birthday to go to the dog races - but surprisingly he kept the presents he bought her. (Unlike me - I had to buy my dream date from him - see previous entry "Credit Crunch"). I know now how bloody lucky I am to be out of that one.

Nathan is lovely. Attentive. Funny. Caring. He doesn't judge me. He doesn't tell me he dislikes curvy girls. He doesn't make me feel like I have to try. He doesn't tell me I'm wrong. He doesn't make me feel like I have to be like him for us to get along. He wants to show me things, take me places, make me try new things and make decisions for myself. Its liberating and wonderful and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy...

But as I said, he is keeping me at arms length - no commitment of the boyfriend/girlfriend word, no "lets meet the parents", no "lets see where the future takes us" - its just two 25 year olds getting to know each other. As it should be. Ruling with your head and not your heart - at least for now...